Texas Fried Bubblegum, Denny’s 1690-Calorie Sandwich and Other Artery Cloggers

Burger King recently ditched “the King” in favor of a focus on more green options (nevermind the fact that avocado on a Whopper might make it more green, but doesn’t really make it more healthy), but in other kitchens across the country, calories and grease are still the order of the day.

Fried Bubblegum

From the great state of Texas, where we’re pretty sure “fried” has its own category in the food pyramid, comes Fried Bubblegum. Technically , it’s not really bubblegum, but a marshmallow coated in bubblegum extract and deep fried, topped with blue icing and sprinkles. No need to get hung up on technicalities though, that seems just as likely to clog an artery as actual fried bubblegum, if not more since you actually eat this as opposed to just chewing it. The concoction has already picked up a trophy for Most Creative food at the Texas State Fair, and beat out competition from Fried Pineapple Upside Down Cake (that sounds slightly more appealing), Fried Autumn Pie (a pumpkin concoction) and the Hans’ Kraut Ball, a deep fried ball of sauerkraut and pork sausage. {Gawker}

Hopefully all of those are served with a side of stints.

The next heart stopping dish is a 1,690 calorie patty melt from Denny’s that comes with macaroni and cheese on top of the burger and an optional cheesy dipping sauce for the side of fries that comes with it. Considering this is the same restaurant that brought us the Bacon Maple sundae, cardiologist may care menu options aren’t really all that surprising, but is it worth the caloric splurge?

The Huffington Post has an employee healthcare plan strong enough to cover sending a writer out to taste test the sandwich, and in spite of the eye-popping calorie count and fat found it to actually be lacking in flavor. The buttered, cheesy pasta/burger combination “only” has 2010mg of sodium compared to the Winner Winner Cheesy Dinner which has 3330mg, so the conclusion is that it just isn’t salty enough to make it taste like you’re swallowing more than an entire day’s worth of saturated fat in one sitting.

Looks like it’s time to give some of the food vendors at the Texas State Fair a call.

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